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Folks...this one is just so easy, that it's not even fun. Without fanfare, I will simply announce that this week's raining dumbass is none other than OJ "The Juice" Simpson. Isn't it written somewhere that with age comes wisdom? This guy seems get stupid-er with each passing day. I know his kids have got to be tired of him embarrassing them! I can just imagine their conversation:
Arnelle Simpson: "Uh oh...Dad's on TV again"
Jason Simpson: "Ok, what's his stupid ass done this time to make me wanna take up residence in a monestery"?
Arnelle: "Says something about a stick up in a Las Vegas hotel"
Jason: "Whatever! I told him I'm not coming down to some jail to visit his ass the next time. I'm so sick of him I'm going to change my name."
Arnelle: "But Jason, he's our Dad!"
Jason: "Whatever! Hey, how does Jason Lipschitz sound?"
Arnelle: "It sounds stupid"
Jason: Whatever! Maybe Jason Gotti...at least if I'm going to be named after a criminal, it won't be a dumb one".
There was really no competition at all this week. This guy now stands convicted of FELONIOUS STUPIDITY and sentenced to so many years in jail that folks don't agree on the count (I was pushing for CAPITAL STUPIDITY so we could exectute him so he can't do anything else stupid).
I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when they hatched this stupid plan.:
OJ: "Hey man that memorabelia-selling dude has got my shit"
Other Criminal Idiot #2: "For real man? Whatchu wanna do?"
Criminal Idiot #3: "Hey OJ , let's go get yo shit man."
Idiot #2: "Yeah, that's it! We'll bum-rush his ass in the hotel and take yo shyt back"
OJ: "Ok, but what if it's a lot of 'em or they fight back"?
Unidentified Idiot: "It's all good OJ...I'm strapped"
OJ: "Yeah...it's all good."
OK, all it would have taken was one moment of even partial sanity by one of the above mentioned idiots to put the brakes on such a stupid-assed idea. NO...no one in that room had one scintilla of anything remotely resembling common sense. Instead that moment became "the Birth of Stupid"! Now this really pisses ABM off! The stupid #%$$%#$ managed to beat the murder rap (for my money he did it, but that's another topic) so he should have taken his ass somewhere and chilled. Instead each year he gets progressively more stupid. I am truly hoping that prison will put a halt to that tumor growing in his head called stupid. Otherwise, stupid will eventually kill him. Well at least now, if he's stupid there, we don't have to watch it on TV.
Congratulations Juice! You are our Idiot of the Week (and likely frontrunner for the Idiot of the Year award)...you better hope Pacman really comes up with a doozy for his next act...and soon, the year's almost over.